Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize