k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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