quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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