Where did you get a picture of my penis
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
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