They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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