alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
