She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
