Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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