she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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