is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
