Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
