Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
You work out of a Hotel?
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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