is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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