I want to walk on stilts...naked
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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