There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize