can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
