Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
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