She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
