hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
