super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
my shit smells like andre
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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