I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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