My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
