I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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