Well douche your snatch and let's go!
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize