We're facebook friends in real life
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
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