I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
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