You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
is this the sara with the beer cane?
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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