Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
