In the future we'll all be gay
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
