you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize