Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
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