Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
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