Please don't use social media to get back at me.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize