week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
