um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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