oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
