Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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