so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
you made out with another girl for some wings
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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