I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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