Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
