Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
