Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize