I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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