I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
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