i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
