brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
