I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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