I heard we made out
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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