remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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