it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize
