i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize