Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
